7/3/18

You decide when it's time

What do you think about, when you think about Time Management?

  • To do lists
  • Planning
  • Doing two things at the same time, like listening to a pod cast or learn another language while you go for a jog?

With these types of tools you can manage your time. But to master your time you need more. 

When you are a Master of your time, you live your life the way you want to. 

I recently read the book Gezien de feiten (a translation could be: Given the circumstances) by the Belgian author Griet Op de Beek. It is a good reminder of the importance of living our lives the way we want to.




Olivia is 71 years old when her husband, Ludo, dies. And she is relieved. The relief makes her feel guilty. She should not feel that way, she must not feel that way. 
Olivia hides her feelings as much as she can, but we all know that does not work. Feelings always seep through. Her daughter Roos wants her mother to grieve, to feel as bad as she does. So when Olivia goes to a poor country as a volunteer Roos does what she can to make her mother feel bad. She wants her to feel guilty. Roos gets even more upset when Olivia leaves anyway and meets the widower Daniel. 

When Olivia is away, she skypes with her daughter. Daniel happily waves to Roos when he sees her on the screen, carelessly kisses Olivia's neck and explains to Roos that all the children adore her mother. 
Roos is not happy, not happy at all and Olivia feels bad. 

After the call Daniel talks to Olivia (The book mixes Dutch and English, since Daniel does not speak Dutch).

"You don't look too happy."
"My daughter wasn't too happy."
"Why?" Zijn stem ging de hoogte in van verwondering.
"She doesn't like it when men kiss me who aren't me husband."
"Your husband?" Hij keek verbaasd. "Who died?"
Olivia haalder haar schouders op. 
"And she called that a kiss?"

[...]

Then Daniel says: 
"Maybe it's time to have the courage to believe that your life is yours"

Do you have the courage to to believe and act as if life is yours? 
Even if it means doing things others may consider wrong? 
Even if you decide it is time to stop grieving and start loving again, a lot sooner than others think you should? 


A little later in the book, Olivia is back in Belgium and she is skypeing with Daniel who is still in his home country. She explains how she is trying to forget Daniel, trying to let him go. He is hurt, he asks her why and she refers to her dead husband.  Daniel interrupts her: 
"Reminds us that life is short, no?"

Life is short. And long. But above all, it is yours. Yours to live. 

The book almost ends well. Except for the last paragraph. So I did what I often do: I decided what the end of the book was to me. That is one of the reasons I like writing stories. I get to decide what happens.

You get to decide what happens in your life. 

Master your time - Master your life.  Let me know if you want my support in that.

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