Your ethical will: When was a time you led with your heart?

Welcome back to Twelve essential questions to tell a life story. By joining me in twelve blog posts you will create what Rabbi Leder calls your ethical will.

By answering the questions your loved ones will get to know you deeper and you will understand yourself better. Let your memories bring meaning!

To join – read the blog posts, reflect on the questions and write down your own answers. You are very welcome to share them in the comments.

Welcome on an interesting journey!

When was a time you led with your heart?

My spontaneous answer is that I lead with my heart most of the time. I want to follow my heart and take my head with me. Following my heart is easy. Discerning the voice of my heart from the voice of my head can be harder.  

I attended a course with author and teacher Jeffrey Allen who described how he used to think he had no intuition. Then he learned to listen to and follow his intuition. It wasn’t until then he realised he had always followed it.

It is the same for me about following my heart. The more I follow it, the more I understand I "always have". Thanks to following my heart I have found the love of my life, a home I love and I have written stories that touch hearts and open minds. 

I have selected one important time I led with my heart that I will share with you. Before I do, let’s have a look at one of the answers in the book For you when I am gone:

"When I was eighteen years old , I ran after a handsome twenty-year-old boy and blocked him from entering the restroom at a restaurant we were both dining at. I knew him - he wasn’t a stranger. I said to him, 

“When you get rid of her” - he had a girlfriend at the time - “and you will… give me a call.” Then I ran back to my table.  

A year and a half later he did. [...] The rest is history."

A time I led with my heart was when I decided to leave the great career I had to become my own boss. 

If you follow me on LinkedIn or if you have listened to one of the podcasts I have been a guest on, you will recognize this story. 

I won’t be here when I turn 50

One of my colleagues turned 50, so we were celebrating her in the office by the riverside.

As she talked about how she hadn’t planned to stay so long at this company I nodded in recognition. Before working at that company, I had changed companies every 2-3 years. But, as my colleague was saying, this company was large enough to satisfy her (and my) need for growth and variation.

Then there was this voice in my head, saying “I won’t be here when I turn 50.”

I didn’t know then, but I know now that it was my intuition talking.

Just before I turned 50 I left the interesting company I had worked so long for, to work full time in my own company.

Not because I wanted to “escape corporate” but because it was time. Time for new adventures.

I haven't regretted it a second - but if I hadn't dared to take that step I would have regretted not doing it many times over by now.

My advice to my loved ones: 

Intuition whispers while conviction shouts.

If you hear or feel it, don’t ignore it. It may be guiding you to something fantastic.

Now it’s your turn.

When was a time you led with your heart?


How to find time in January - Use 3 types of plans

Are you all excited about the new year?

Eager to achieve and experience new things?

I hope so! I know I am.

Are you also worried you may not get them done?
Maybe you worry about losing energy and enthusiasm on the way or getting overwhelmed.
No need to worry. 
By using 3 types of straight-forward plans you can stay balanced, on track and out of last-minute rush!

Find time in January, by introducing and using 3 levels of plans:

Your weekly plan.

Make sure you spend your week in ways that give energy and room for what you want. Only then can you use your time efficiently. You can learn more about weekly planning here

Your Daily plan.

Keep yourself on track without overloading your brain. Focus on 3 wanted outcomes, keep track of all deadlines and appointments and see anything else as bonus. You can learn more about daily planning here. 

Your monthly plan.

Avoid last-minute rush and unnecessary collisions with a monthly outlook. No need to go into details, just look ahead and see how you can be ready for different events and appointments. You can learn more about monthly planning here.

These 3 types of plans have helped many, I hope they will help you achieve what you want this year, in a balanced and fun way!