How to reduce stress by exchanging one letter

Do you suffer from FOMO (the Fear Of Missing Out)?

If you do, it may stress you out.
Staying up to date or attempting to control “everything” is not a good way to spend your time or energy. 

Recently I attended the Distributed 2020 event.

In a panel discussion David Darmanin, CEO of HotJar, warned about FOMO.

He said that at HotJar they instead talk about: 

 

JOMO, Joy Of Missing Out. 

I used to stay up to date on news.
After realizing how the negativity in the news affected me, 

I reduced my news consumption considerably.
I am happily missing out on it and only read TIME nowadays.

What will you choose to joyfully miss out on?

Friend or foe? How to make more of the former and fewer of the latter

The old-fashioned language in the well-known sentence "Friend or Foe" shows us that we have divided people around us as either friend or foe for a long time.

We have all heard the phrase:

“I’d rather have an honest enemy than a fake friend”

but that doesn’t change the fact that we want to have many true friends and few foes. 

When it comes to dealing with enemies, let’s look at what some influential persons have to say about it.

 

1. Don’t make enemies.

Some frown at this advice, thinking “not making enemies” means you don’t stand up for yourself or what you believe in. As if fighting and arguing shows that you are strong and committed while not doing so means being fearful and indifferent.

What if it just means you stick to what you believe, regardless of what others say or do?

Bob Proctor put it well in one of his books:

Act as if you have:

“Nothing to defend, nothing to attack, nothing to prove. You just know.”

Tony Robbin’s says the same thing in his straight forward way:

“Opinions are like ass-holes. Everyone’s got one. That doesn’t mean you have to wave it around.”

If you can avoid making enemies, great.

If you have already made some, then what?

2. Leave your enemies until they make a mistake

Rather than trying to destroy your enemy one way or the other, you can take the stance of  Napoleon Bonaparte and let them mess up themselves.

“N’interrompez jamais un ennemi qui est en train de faire une erreur.”

 (Never interrupt an enemy who is about to make a mistake.)

3. Transform them

My favourite way though, and the quote that inspired me to write this post, comes from Abraham Lincoln. During the Civil War he was criticized by some for showing respect for Southerners instead of seeing them as enemies that should be destroyed.

His answer?

“Do I not destroy my enemies when I make them my friends?”

Of course he did.  

I hope you will refrain from making enemies, and if you have already made a few, I hope you destroy them by making them your friends.

Listen to the podcast - Annika interviewed by the Thoughtful Entrepreneur

If you would like to hear about my entrepreneur journey and get advice about time management at the same time, just listen to the Thoughtful Entrepreneur podcast when they interviewed me. 😀

Whenever you are able to listen for 30 minutes, put your earphones in and listen to: 

https://player.captivate.fm/episode/86ebd2c6-a06f-4012-9b0b-5102a16f8828

I hope it will be valuable for you!

Annika

The secret to ever-lasting love

Step 1: Know that you are loveable. Feel it. Believe it.

Step 2: Find the love of your life

Step 3: Love and be loved

Step 4: Spread the love 

If you skip step 1, it won’t help if you get to step 2. You will not be able to stay in step 3.

It’s hard to love and be loved if you don’t think you’re worthy of love.

Even if your partner loves you and shows it, you will not believe it.

How could you, if deep inside you don’t think you are loveable?

We are often taught that it is selfish to love and accept ourselves the way we are.

Nothing could be further from the truth.

If you don’t love yourself, you will not receive and trust someone else’s love either.

Have you ever offered love but heard from your loved one (s)he doesn't believe you? 

That hurts.

So loving yourself is not selfish or egoistic.

It is a pre-requisite for receiving love from others and truly loving them.

You are worthy of love.

We all are.

Allow yourself to give and receive love.

Only then can you get to the important step 4 above. 

PS. My husband thinks that the secret to everlasting love is great sex ;)

You're already naked

Steve Jobs once said: 

“Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.”

There is no reason to not follow our hearts. Yet we often follow something or someone else than our hearts.

We do what we’re told, we do what we think is expected from us, we do what we think we should. 

Occasionally we stop and wonder: 

Is this it? Is this what I want my life to be like?

It’s not that we don’t want to follow our hearts. 

Sometimes we just don’t know what our hearts want.

It’s easy to say “follow your passion”, but if you don’t know what that is, it doesn’t matter if you have the guts to follow it.

My Timefinder Academy is helping each participant find and fly to their Ikigai, their life’s purpose.

You are welcome to join.

After all, you have nothing to lose.

You are already naked.

Read more about flying to your Ikigai here

Secure a happy ending

Last week my father attended the funeral of his sister, my aunt.

This week another one of my aunts will be buried.

They both died within one week.

Their deaths were of the kind we normally refer to as “natural”.

They were both in their eighties.

One of them died in her sleep, the other one in the hospital holding her oldest son’s hand.

Their husbands had already gone before them. 

Even so.

Whenever someone leaves this life, we are left with a hole in our everyday existence.

Depending on our beliefs about what happens when we die, the hole can feel smaller or bigger.

Apart from the feeling of loss, death gives us a reminder.

A reminder that there is no such thing as a happy ending to an unhappy journey.

A reminder that now is the time to be happy, now is the time to explore, now is the time to love.

Now is the time to start living happily ever after.

Do you have a reason to look ugly?

Niki Lauda’s “reason for looking ugly” was that he had been in accidents as a Formula 1 driver. 

I hope no one calls you ugly.

But maybe you get called something else from time to time?

Too hard, too kind, too fast, too slow...

One consequence of being a leader (and yes, every parent is also a leader) is that you stick out, you call the shots.

You may be the one taking the blame and the one making sure the whole team gets the credit.

To paraphrase Niki Lauda:

Leaders have a reason to be criticized.

What reason is that for you?

For doing too little, too much or just doing things differently?

Feedback is inevitable.

Welcome it.

Just make sure you get criticized for reasons you think are worth it.